NUMB

Do you Remember, You once told me, that no matter what may come our way, we would have each other by our side, but why is it that I sit here, all alone, thinking about you and thinking about what could’ve or should’ve been?

We’d known each other for years throughout the highs and the lows. And you know what? what stayed constant was the bond that we shared, but now that just seems unreal to me. Tell me, where did I go wrong?

We fought and we made up, we laughed and we cried, you understood who I was, where I came from and now that you’re not here with me anymore, there’s no one who ‘gets’ me anymore like you did. Why’d you have to go?

We promised to be there for each other through thick and thin, but why is it that I can't seem to find you anywhere, now that when I need you the most?

I fell in love with your imperfections, not with the pretty face you put up for the world. I made mistakes, I fucked up at times, but hey! we all did, ain't we?

I can't seem to figure out why I let you go, why I sat there that day and didn't stop you from leaving, why I didn't call out your name and tell you "stop there! how much I needed you, how much you meant to me" but wait, you never even once looked back, did you?

You never believed in what I said, you always thought I was one of them, and your insecurities didn't seem to end. Why? Why couldn't you trust me?

I always wanted what was best for you. I always wanted you to live the life we talked about, the life where we would get coffee every day and all we would ever need was each other's company, but I guess, somewhere along the line you stopped wanting that, didn’t you?

You changed, and I tried to accept you for the person you had become but the hurt became unbearable and I just couldn't do it anymore. I just couldn't.

I told you I’d get over it soon, that all of this would soon be history to me, but tell me, why I get dream of you, why is it that I sit here writing this at 4 o'clock in morning with full of tears in my eyes and feeling of emptiness in my heart? But you on the other hand; you don't feel a thing, do you? When did you become so numb?